A very well written article, and one I would have found immensely helpful a year or so ago. (Funny how I've aged a decade in the year before the century since January 21...) I had to remind myself when talking with my therapist a month ago that I had only been dressing gender appropriately for a year; it still amazes me to think that I had (and thought I loved!) a beard down to mid chest 18 months ago. The psychological defenses are hugely powerful, because they are a you note keyed to survival - they /really/ don't want you to do anything they've learned well harm you or potentially cause your social or physical death - like, y'know, actually admitting out loud you were never the gender you've been pretending to be since you first got smacked down for telling "trusted adults" as a very small child. It is absolutely a testament to our strength and resilience that we have survived decades in the wrong "box," and the more successful we have been the harder the defenses work initially to keep us from "blowing it." And, commensurately, the greater the relief and return of mental resources to our "spoon drawer" to just live and enjoy life - which is why even in the face of the rapidly escalating need for ever more "spoons," we /still/ choose reality over compliance, and we can be confident we've already been through the fire - we /know/ we have the strength to survive this, too... especially now that we're not alone. 💖