Maybe girls should be taught that if we want to be equal to men, that doesn't just mean equal rights, it also means *equal responsibility*.

Saying that women are equal is pretty hollow if you presume that we can be "abused" via internet (my router hasn't slapped me even once!), and that their safety depends on men rather than themselves. I've never, ever met an incel who could throw a punch to save his life. I've never, ever met pornography that jumped out of a screen and hurt someone. 90% of men I meet today couldn't win a physical altercation with 14yo me, let alone now after decades of martial arts and life experience (not to mention a bit taller and stronger).

Despite the rhetoric, we aren't generally talking about physical threats, but social ones, and women need to learn that these are not the same thing. Misogyny doesn't reach out and grab someone, and the chances of a human becoming violent on the basis of their feelings toward or about women is dwindling. Fewer men are even capable of violence today than when I was growing up in the 1990s. Our rates of violent crime throughout the US are a fraction now of what they were then.

If you are over 18 and not capable of basic self-defense, you are part of the problem. Sadly, this is most adults today in America.

If you are over 18 and you don't know that sticks and stones can break your bones, but words can never hurt you...you are part of the problem.

If you are over 18 and so afraid of the world that you will fail to assume positive intent, instead reading threats into every social mistake and awkward situation...yep, part of the problem.

If you are over 18 and you think someone can be guilty of bad faith for violating a boundary you failed to clearly and unambiguously communicate...you are part of the problem.

Many women don't think these things are their responsibility. They want to be equal to men in privilege, but don't take responsibility for their own comfort and safety, instead demanding that men provide it to them.

Isn't it time to get off that Victorian-era fainting couch? We're grown-ups, we can not just take care of ourselves, but kick ass. Taking a position of weakness is not only pathetic, it's irresponsible and hypocritical.