I agree that it's very difficult for a typical man to respond to this kind of relational aggression. If it had happened to a woman, she would at least have had an idea how to find allies in her workplace or at least outside of work. She would likely have had a more advanced vocabulary for talking about how it hurt her and why it was so unfair. Most men don't have that vocabulary and don't necessarily find useful that kind of talking out of feelings. Unfortunately, relational aggression seems to be becoming more and more common in many workplace settings.