Thanks Stephen for the tips. I ought not engage in personal "anecdotary" but I cannot resist temptation so I shall yield to it. Unlike you, we divorced amicably in 1978. It made no difference. I discovered that personal circumstance, like being a committed male sole parent, was subordinate to gender specific marital separation laws as demanded by what was then the "Women's Movement". Pretty quickly I lost financial security, a high intensity surgical career and masculine naivety, and long before the Red Pill became a thing.

Next, I discovered what was much later described (but not DSM classified) as covert narcissism during a short tempestuous second marriage in 80s. Like many awakening men these days, I am not Incel, rather a justifiably fearful "Vcel" - should be easy to figure out what it means. I am alone, reflective and content. My children and theirs gave and give me purpose.