Day 7 (Day 5 if you’re keeping track in business days) of life without a day job.

Here are some of my thoughts from the last week:

Looking for a job is a full-time job. I am trying to devise a plan to do this for a while without getting burned out. I remember countless slam dunk interviews that went nowhere over and over from last time.

I have to prepare myself for this to go bad for a while without losing hope.

Torn between hurrying up to find something else and to avoid a period of no income and to think about whether or not I even want to continue to do what I have done for the past decade. Working on multiple resumes to highlight different skillsets. I think I could enjoy working in change management, communications, customer education/enablement. I will be sold to the highest bidder, but it might be a great time to try something new. I’ve often said I don’t want to design training for the next 20+ years.

I hate being a beggar and not a chooser.

I have had a few promising interviews, but all have drawbacks that would have me passing under typical circumstances. Dream gig with no health insurance. Gig I’m not dying to take but has good benefits and comparable salary, but minimal PTO. The dream of remaining fully remote seems to be dead, too, so I am glad I kept a stash of business casual clothes in the back of my closest.

Also trying to remember that I’m in a pretty privileged place as far as job hunting goes. I am experienced and educated. It could be way worse.

Keeping in touch with a friend from the last job is revealing to me that it’s probably best to be gone, even though ripping off the band-aid stings. My observations about the current issues that have gone unaddressed and impending fallout are coming to life.

I have taken a little pleasure in learning about the consequences the leaders are having related to how they handled this situation.

It’s so strange how all of us are just expected to keep on working like nothing is going on. I used to imagine that the world ground to a halt during world wars and civil unrest, but now I realize that life during the transition to fascism is a lot less disruptive to my daily routine than I expected. Then I remember that I have watched countless films set in other countries where things are crumbling, but lots of everyday life remains mostly untouched.

Feeling supported and understood by my partner is the greatest gift. I am so relieved to not have to scrutinize every thought and word before it leaves my mouth.

I am reading a section of Oliver Burkeman’s Meditations for Mortals each day. It’s been helpful and affirming. I became a fan when I read The Antidote a few years ago. Plan for the worst and you can diminish your fear of it happening. You have faced the worst down before it happens. You are prepared. You have a plan. You have an alternate plan.

On that note, remembering that I got through other tough times is not a cure-all, but it’s not nothing, either. If you are searching, too, let me know how we can help each other.