Over the last couple of months I’ve had the pleasure of befriending a wild forest cat. I’ve named him Charles, because of the irony. Now - the irony is reflected back on me.

Charles has taught me a lot about the ‘wounded animal’ concept as I was going through deep shadow work. At first, he would barely let me see him. But I knew he was eating from the food I left for my other two cats.

Then, he started getting more comfortable in the area. Which started the dance around setting boundaries over our territory. Charles was harming my female cat Luna (my familiar) in his advances towards her. And in the beginning: I would shoo him away whenever I saw him. Hoping this would keep her safe.

But then it dawned on me, that I had an opportunity here to learn from nature. Observe and see how this would play out.

Ever since, I’ve been able to align with him and recognized that he was very scared of me. Not because of something I had done to him, but because of what was done to him by others. I needed to build trust.

Building trust takes time. It comes with a lot of mistakes. You need to learn each others language and understand that your normal, isn’t the same as what another pers… cat, experiences as normal.

Essentially you need to treat each other as aliens and develop a new language. It requires you to be deeply aware of everything that you communicate. Every twitch, every alteration in your stance; it can be interpreted in a particular way.

It’s a beautiful process to learn more about yourself. Animals, especially wild ones, will directly reflect back to you how you act. By now, there’s a new order between the three cats. Charles has become ‘the alpha’, but also… recognizes me as his equal.

Because of this, we are now good friends and… he was really missing out on love. I’ve never experienced a more cuddly cat, I can even carry him in my arms for a while now. And while he’s still aggressive towards the other male cat (Fierce). Luna and him now have an understanding. Furthermore I’ve also been able to communicate to Charles, that I want him to honor my ‘rules’. As such, he now lets Luna pass without hunting her while I’m around. And Luna knows how to use the safety she has around me, to keep herself from being molested.

My next experiment is to separate the food bowl into multiple bowls and see if I can further put Charles at ease over this situation. Eventually it’s my hope that he will allow Fierce to be in this territory as well. However, for that to occur, he shouldn’t feel the need to defend this place. And with his past, that will take some time. It’s a delicate balance of showing to Charles that he’s welcome and safe, while equally increasing the boundaries when it comes to aggression. However, it’s not my place to determine how nature plays out; nature is my teacher. I’m but a student who learns.

In the end, all I’m trying to say here is that we can see someone as a foe. But if we give it time and approach someone with an open mind, we might just find that we can be the best of friends. Of course that requires input from both sides and it can mean that your current community will think you’re crazy. But you learn the most from those who you see as your ‘enemy’. In nature, there are no enemies. Just interactions, boundaries, and patience.

So maybe this cat does deserve a sophisticated name. Maybe he’s not that wild after all. Maybe ‘Charles’ is the right name, even though he’s Portuguese. Names are funny things… they start to seem appropriate, the longer you interact with someone.

Anyway. That’s the story for now. I hope you enjoyed it and have a great rest of your day!