A few days ago, I met a masculine black lesbian who identifies as an indigenous nonbinary person. She was super friendly & seemed to be very interested in getting to know me and my work and meeting up again.

So when she reached out I made sure to link She Holds The Line: Black Women Speak on Gender Ideology along with my website, and I told her that if she resonates with my work I’d be happy to chat.

I have not heard from her since and tbh I expect to receive a scornful look or perhaps a cold shoulder next time I see her.

I shared because I am not interested in hiding who I am, and I am ready for people to start gossiping about me if it means living more authentically.

The book is designed to breakthrough echo chambers, and I am genuinely open to having a conversation with someone who is new to the subject, if they are open minded & particularly if they are part of my community. Not really to teach or debate, but to offer space to share.

It’s interesting though that I am always going to be pegged as the hateful person. I understand that many people will look at me like stinky social outcast in high school who is rumored to have some deep dirty secret. I really do get how people paint me ugly; how unflattering it is to have ‘phobe’ attached to my character.

But I’m kind of just over it and it’s exhausting to constantly wear masks all the time. And honestly if you can’t handle the realness I’m carrying I don’t want to fucks with you anyway.