Activist: "The water usage for beef is obscene. Thousands of litres per kilogram."

Farmer: "That's rainfall."

Activist: "What?"

Farmer: "The figure includes all the rain that falls on the pasture. The cows drink from the stream. The rain falls whether there's a cow here or not."

Activist: "It's still water consumption."

Farmer: "Should I stop the rain falling on my field?"

Activist: "Grow crops instead. More efficient."

Farmer: "This is a 35-degree slope in the Welsh hills. Show me the crop."

Activist: "Technology..."

Farmer: "To make tractors climb mountains?"

Activist: "There must be a solution."

Farmer: "There is. It's called a cow."

Activist: [checks phone]