IF RUN BRANDS WERE BANDS (Part 1)

NIKE: Coldplay. Started out warm and cute, early career mastery then got shot out of a commercial cannon so large they ask what city they are in before they walk on stage.

TRACKSMITH: Vampire Weekend. Know a good flat white when they see one, living with major Ivy League northeast ‘you wish’ energy. Actually finished reading Infinite Jest.

BROOKS: Steely Dan. Never cool / always cool, technically and insufferably excellent but we just can’t bring ourselves to admit that publicly.

ON: Imagine Dragons. They have no idea who they’re for either.

SATISFY: Kid Rock. Got in the pit and tried to love someone and now things aren’t going too well. But were they ever?