Last week was the due date for the fourth baby we hoped to adopt. The baby passed away months ago, but my heart hasn’t quite let go. This week, I am sharing about the complicated emotions we experienced about this adoption, both before and after the loss.
Shrieking this at myself in the mirror. The world has felt so heavy these past few weeks + I refuse to either a) walk around with eyes glued shut or b) catastrophize and fear-monger. Your power is limited. You don’t get to say when you exist. And staying calm and regulated is one of the most powerful tools in your arsenal.
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I'm in favor of shorter engagements, around 6 months, rather than waiting a year or more for the “perfect wedding". My main motivation is chastity: it is really heard for engaged couples to be chaste when after some arbitrary future date, what is not permitted today will be required of them. Most of the arguments for longer engagements are bad, but I think ALL the arguments for longer engagements based on the demands of planning a wedding are bad. And now we find that shorter engagements can cost about half of longer engagements: