"she has felt them on her for a long time" the way you've created a whole world in such a short amount of time is brazy. & I agree with Nori about the repetition, especially "Just less pure", i feel for Samar man 😢 ! The melody and music in "blood that has bunched the sand into clumps", "its chatter warm",& "stuck in bloodied sand" it could almost be a ballad, esp with the rain in the background. But my favourite line is when you ask "Would they harbour her own?", lucid language that conveys so much.

Come see the coldest pen in South 😤 !

Allah bless you and your pen, and forgive Samar