Your honesty and self reflection is so vital for SO SO SO many other athletes who are and/or have battled this same demon. You are not alone and I SO SO SO admire you for sharing the tug of war you have had with your own identity. The you you always admired and loved is still here, she is more wise, honest and loving than ever before... having 20/20 hindsight is what will ensure other athletes do not struggle alone... helping others know they are not alone is such a powerful step. There is NO DOUBT in my mind that you will rise far above this old demon and be the true Veronica you have always been. Intentional, focused, self assured and now... more than every... graceful in your actions, loving in your nurturing and thankful for Veronica's durability to continue forward. Bravo! Chapeau! Alle! Alle!