Larry, in a strange way, I envy you. You had the opportunity to prepare for the loss of your spouse. I was not given that chance. My husband took his life just over a month ago. I had no forewarning that anything like this was going to happen. We were in an amazing place in our 36+ years of marriage. We had it all. You know why your wife passed, I do not know why my husband took his life. As you probably understand, men have difficulty expressing their feelings. Thanksgiving day, Bill just kept telling me over and over, how much he loved me. How much he appreciated me. The last time I saw him was at 3:00 am Friday. I thought he was sleeping, but now, I doubt it. At 5:00 am I got up to check on him and he was gone. He had gone outside and taken his life. He didn’t want to leave a mess in the house. I will never know what was going on in his mind. He had fallen on the 23rd and hit his head. Broken two vertebrae in his neck. The medical system let him down. I’ll never know if it was the pain that they refused to give him medication for, or something else. These questions will haunt me for the rest of my life. The situations were different, but the trauma of the loss is the same. You will be in my prayers always.