I do think that sometimes people make the opposite mistake of engaging in excessive self-doubt/self-questioning, but it is less common.

In any case, as a matter of social technology, perhaps we should develop a “yellow card” for guys who are being kinda creepy, but not to the degree you’d want to destroy their lives over it (“red card” territory).

It’s hard to get better at anything without practice and data. Think about learning to hit a baseball—you won’t get very far if you only have a bat to swing with no ball to hit. And men and women do have different desires and experiences. I think a big part of male creepiness is, in some sense, resulting from the previous generation of feminism which preached that men and women are basically identical, differences in physical size/strength are not important, we should abolish gender roles, women can enjoy sex too, and disagreeing with any of that is politically incorrect and upholds patriarchy. Too many guys listened to that generation of feminism and concluded “oh she’s horny just like me, she probably wants to fuck 10 minutes after meeting just like I do”. That’s how it works for gay guys after all.