“Reckoning with age comes with a lot of heavy realizations: the wrinkles around my eyes are just the beginning, my fertility is rapidly waning past the point of no return, the current job market might not recover in time for me to make some moves, people don’t like listening to music anymore (because people seem to not really like anything anymore), and despite marriage and a happy life together, death is inevitable and so is the loss that comes along with it.

I’m not going to dwell on that though. I’m going to live my life. I’m going to ride the waves. I’m going to roll with the punches, though it goes against my God-given inclination to game-theorize myself into the illusion of safety.

I’m thankful to have made it here. I’m in love. I’m creating art again. I have a job. I have a beautiful home and I’m going to have a glass of nice wine on my lovely porch after I’m done writing this.”