When you're the target of family scapegoating behaviors and finally start setting boundaries...
📢 Family: "You're so selfish and dramatic!"“You’re a narcissist!” “You’re a liar, we’ve never done anything to you!” “You’re the abusive one!”
😌 You, finally healing: "No, I just decided to stop tolerating your terrible treatment of me."
Learn …
Highly Recommended: Rebecca C. Mandeville’s Groundbreaking Book on Family Scapegoating Abuse
If you’ve ever struggled to make sense of deep family wounds, Rebecca C. Mandeville’s book Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed is essential reading. As the pioneering voice behind the term Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA), she brings clarity and validatio…
I'm excited to announce my introductory book on the devastating Family System’s phenomenon I named Family Scapegoating Abuse (FSA), Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed, will be promoted as part of a special sale on Smashwords to celebrate 2025 Read an Ebook Week from March 2 - March 8.
Be sure to follow me here on my Notes section for more upda…
“It was as simple as that—and as hard as choosing something different from what I knew, over and over again. Choosing against everything that told me not to exist, to conform, to shapeshift into others’ projections, to die. One day, I chose life. And then I chose it again, despite the pain, because the greatest truth I know is this: to b…
Love this, Julia, and appreciate the mention. I was a 'free range child' due to the fact my father abandoned the family, disappearing for 37 years until I found him, and my mother worked full time as a result to support us. At the age of 6 I pleaded to be able to go home versus the babysitter's after school and she relented and I became …
New Content Release Calendar: It's taken the 8 months I've been on Substack to get a feel for the needs, including the flow of new content releases, for my paid subscriber community. During this time, I have made sure to get feedback via surveys and comments regarding how often I release new posts and chats and this calendar reflects wha…
Do you struggle with rumination and wonder if you’ll ever be free of re-playing painful scenes from past interactions with scapegoating family members? Radical Acceptance can be an antidote for rumination, as described in a post I released last October:
Excellent article from . Telling people who have experienced profound rejection in their past, including within their family of origin, that they are overreacting or too sensitive or to get over it or judging them for what they need to do to take care of themselves and their nervous system is not helpful and is definitely not a trauma-in…
I call this ‘quiet violence’ - which goes hand-in-hand with ‘invisible’ (psycho-emotional) abuse in families.
Another must-read post from . Excerpt: “Intimacy begins with connection. If I am disconnected from myself, I cannot fully see into myself, let alone allow another to truly "Into-Me-See." While therapists often explore this concept through the lens of attachment—our bonds with others—this perspective may not always address a deeper issue:…