My son was climbing on our rocking chair and he climbed until it fell backward and flung him to the floor with a crash.

It scared me so much that I went to yell at him about how dangerous and silly that was but before any words came out I caught myself.

I remembered being a child.

I remembered the scares, I remembered being blasted as my nervous system sent snakes through my skin until I felt so much shame and so alone and then distanced from my well-meaning parents whose love often came out in a shout.

So I shut my mouth and opened my arms and he ran to me and we hugged each other so tight and I could feel the nerves slither through him, his tiny heart racing, and I was grateful to be the one to hold him through the fear, the shame, the mistake.

Sometimes you just got to shut your mouth and open your arms confident that the lesson will be learned as the love is heard.