I am not sick… but I see things others do not.

I used to be a normal young man—maybe even a little more than that. I had ambition. I had a clear dream I was chasing. I loved my studies; they were my escape from the noise of the world. And I had friends who were just like me… we grew up together, laughed together, and imagined a future that would bring us all together.

Then the war came… and nothing in my life remained the same.

I am no longer who I used to be.

I no longer think about my ambitions, my education, or even my future.

All I think about now is:

How will I feed my family tomorrow?

How will I bring them water?

My big dreams have turned into small needs… but they are much harder to achieve.

And at night… my real story begins.

When everything goes quiet and the city sinks into darkness, I do not find peace… I find them.

My friends.

I see them every night, standing in the shadows. They are not as they used to be—not laughing, not alive—but silent… staring at me. I feel like they are watching me, waiting for an answer I do not have.

They ask me:

“Why did this happen?”

“Why us?”

“Why were we killed?”

And I… stand there helpless.

I have no answer.

No explanation.

Not even the strength to lie just to comfort them.

I wake up as if I have come back from a battle… but the battle is not outside—it is inside me.

There is a war in my mind that never stops.

My thoughts attack me, pulling me into dark places, making me feel like I am no longer the person I once knew.

Sometimes I look at myself… and I don’t recognize who I’ve become.

But despite all of this…

despite the fear, the exhaustion, and the loss… there is one thing still alive inside me.

I know they want me like this.

Broken… afraid… without dreams… without purpose.

And that is why… I will not give them what they want.

I will not give up.

I will be patient… even if patience hurts.

I will try… even if I am tired.

I will try to reclaim my dreams, even if only a small part of them.

To dream again… even if quietly.

I no longer dream the way I used to…

I no longer ask for much.

All I want now…

is for this war to end.

For life to return to what it once was.

To wake up one day… and not see death everywhere.

I want to find myself again…

that young man who once had dreams, passion, and friends…

even if none of them are still here.