Just got a STERN talking to from a stewardess for talking through her safety demonstration. She then went on to quiz me, asking where the flotation device is located.

I said, “Under the seat.”

She said, “Wrong! Your seat is the flotation device.”

I wanted to say look sweetheart, though I respect your dedication to the profession, we’re flying to fucking Ohio. Unless we got parachutes I think your whole demo is a moot point.