The thing about narcissistic abuse, is that it thrives on disorientation. The more disconnected, overwhelmed, unmoored, and untethered we are from reality, our people, our bodies, our sense of self & that which we know to be true — the more likely we are to begin engaging in self-blame, self-gaslighting, and acting outside of our character. We may even start believing we deserve to be harmed. This is where some of the worst pain happens because we may begin unwittingly participating in our own harm; organizing ourselves only around threat so we can stay safe.

But as we come out of that fog, we begin to learn there our other ways available to us. We can allow our nervous system to orient to safety. We can access the God-given wisdom of our bodies. We can find people who actually want us to heal, and be well, not because they are tired of our pain but because they love us so dang much. I love Cole Arthur Riley’s language of “stay near to yourself.” Indeed, may we live from the center of our God-given selves.

Selah.