Restacking this so I can regale all with my tale of banishment (names adjusted for privacy).

After moving to France, I joined a book club. I was thrilled to find what seemed like a kind, non-judgmental group of readers.

I cheerfully attended several meetings, sharing my reads and hearing about others’.

Sure, I was surprised when the leader’s husband, whom I mistook for her gay brother for the first three meetings, read Glennon Doyle. But live and let live, I say!

Then came the meeting where I read Civilization: The West and the Rest by Niall Ferguson.

For those unfamiliar, Civilization explores how and why the West—especially the U.S. and Great Britain—rose to global power, while China, Central and South America, and Africa did not.

Colonialism, Ferguson posits, is not necessarily the reason. After all, England and the U.S. had colonies. He also details, quite clearly, the horrors inflicted by European countries on their colonies. He writes about trade, capitalism (that old scourge), shipbuilding, private property, and more.

This was not acceptable.

After being aggressively interrogated by Caroline (Scottish? I think, the chip on the shoulder can be attributed to almost anything) and Destiny, a tarot card reader, I changed the subject, assuming we could move on like adults.

Lo, this was not the case.

The leader, who speaks no French, lives in her grandfather’s apartment, and dispenses “life abroad” advice on YouTube despite not filing her taxes properly, asked me to coffee a few weeks later. A few weeks at this point.

I eagerly agreed, thinking we were friends.

Forty-five minutes in, she gave me the UMC AWFL faux-sympathy eyes: “So, how’s the book club going for you?”

I said, “Well, I was surprised by the tone at the last meeting, but I hope we can move on.”

She replied, “I thought some of your comments were personal rather than about the book.”

I said, “It’s a 245+ page book. I referenced pages and chapters as best I could, even while facing some fairly aggressive responses.”

She said, “Well, I think we just need to remember to keep it about the book.”

At that point, fluent in UMC-PMC-NPC speak, I realized she was asking me to leave.

I smiled and said, “It was nice meeting you and Mr. Otter. Let me know if you ever need anything while you're in Paris.”

I grabbed my things and left.

And that’s the story.