COTD (@calloffthedogs): "Man-pleasing has become excruciatingly hard to perform as I get older, leaves me mad and depressed, and it continues to be a basic survival skill, because men still own the world. I try not to be angry with my mother for the degree to which she bought in to man-pleasing, because…"

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Man-pleasing has become excruciatingly hard to perform as I get older, leaves me mad and depressed, and it continues to be a basic survival skill, because men still own the world. I try not to be angry with my mother for the degree to which she bought in to man-pleasing, because without it she wouldn’t have been able to accomplish anything.

I, her daughter, inherited this posture and performed it well for decades. I can still expertly anticipate a man’s discomfort and work around it. Translate what he means. Steady, encourage, coach. Help him look good at my own expense. It is permanently imprinted in me — inherited responses that continue to arise involuntarily. And now that I’m no longer performing, I have become a threat to her worldview.

avalon

Mar 12

1:51 PM

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