What people get wrong the most about my role as a caregiver is that I somehow wanted this role to begin with. So many well-meaning people — and they do have good intentions — tell us how great we are for being so “on top of things” regarding Bray Bray’s care, his equipment, and his medications.

As I said in a raw conversation with fellow Parent Carer Denise Servais just this week when talking about people saying “How do you do all of it?”, I mean what choice do we have? Do they think I wanted to master how to use a CPAP Machine for Bray Bray’s sleep apnea, or learn all of the little tricks of getting his anti-seizure medication on time, or spend countless hours I don’t really have filling out paperwork so I can get him a fully motorized bed he needed that insurance refused to cover?

We have had to learn these things because we’ll do anything for Bray Bray, but don’t mistake “need” for “want” or “strength” for “obligation”.