As a born-and-raised Italian who has lived in the United States for a decade, I am shocked by how out of touch these ubiquitous narratives are.

How do wealthy, educated Americans not realize that wages are proportional to cost of living — that is, if they can even keep up with it! — and what is “affordable” (to quote the author) to folks who have earned American salaries (myself included) isn’t affordable to Italians in the same way?

How can you even begin to suggest that inefficient Italian bureaucracy is “charming” when for some people that inefficiency means, say, not receiving your unemployment subsidy on time to pay your mortgage?

I’m painfully aware of how far my American money goes when I’m back home in Italy, but I would never point that out in front of my Italian friends and family. In most cases, they simply will never be able to attain the same level of wealth. Harping about “the slow life” is tone-deaf at best; offensive at worst.

If I am flattered by how many Americans appreciate my home country, I’m also flat-out repulsed by how many of them treat Italy like a giant playground with no sense whatsoever of what real life looks and feels like for Italian people.

I don’t know how else I need to send this message. It’s a plea for respect toward my people and my country.