I haven’t taken photos of myself or been in front of a camera for over a year, & today I decided to give it a whirl, which has sent me into a bit of a spiral because the camera isn’t the same as the mirror.

idk how to reconcile the feeling of wanting to be seen, not being able to leave the house, & having my only available option be the camera on my phone which distorts how I look.

& here I am now, still screaming into the void, wondering why.