Me: Ooh! My lucky iron fish has arrived! This can add 6-8mg of iron to your intake a day. You just boil it in a litre of water for 10 mins

The Husband: That’s good. Let’s do it.

Me: Ohhh, she’s cute!

Him: Don’t get emotionally attached to the iron supplement.

Me: She seems to be telling me she is Canadian. I’ll call her “Alberta.” It suits her!

Him: Don’t name the lump of iron.

Me: She’s good until her smile starts to fade. Usually after 5 years. Then you throw her away and get a new one. That seems a bit mean.

Him: Helen…

Me: We’ll retire her with dignity.

Him: The water is boiling. I’ve squeezed in lemon juice. Stick the iron in

Me:🥺

Him: 🤨

Me: I don’t want to boil Alberta!

Him: 😖