This is an occupational hazard when one is a writer and many of one’s friends are also writers. One’s quirks and mannerisms are liable to be held up for scrutiny. (The things I could tell you about Carrie’s eyebrows).

I prefer the noise of discontent I allegedly make being described as a ‘puff.’ The Grievance Studies team used to call it “the Helen growl” and in group calls, somebody would say “Uh oh, I just heard the Helen growl. Why are you about to veto this idea?” I would respond indignantly that I do not ‘growl’ and had, in fact, made no sound at all before explaining why I was not in favour of the idea.

I will accept that I do growl-puff when I disapprove of something. Mostly, I will accept it because my father did it. It’s something like a percussive sigh with some low back-of-the-throat vocalisation and I have always thought of it as my dad’s warning sign. I only realised I did it too when friends started making fun of it. It may be that I learned it from him but I like to think it is hereditary.

Anyway, read Carrie’s piece which only touches briefly on my admonitory exhalations and is about the ethical problems of being erroneously advised to consider oneself seriously and lastingly mentally ill in adolescence and how she eventually overcame this.