"Freda Wallace is at trans identifying man ...."
You mean a "transwoman", a male transvestite? Calling a spade an effen shovel right out of the chute might be a good start, although I doubt "Freda" would think so.
But you might also reflect on philosopher Will Durant's take on a classic quote of Voltaire's:
Durant: “ 'If you wish to converse with me,' said Voltaire, 'define your terms.' How many a debate would have been deflated into a paragraph if the disputants had dared to define their terms! This is the alpha and omega of logic, the heart and soul of it, that every important term in serious discourse shall be subjected to strictest scrutiny and definition. It is difficult, and ruthlessly tests the mind; but once done it is half of any task."
quotefancy.com/quote/3001527/Will-Duran…
In that spirit, you might then try getting agreement on the standard biological definitions for the sexes, and a more or less standard one about gender from both some sensible feminists in the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy [SEP], and the late great Justice Anton Scalia of the US Supreme Court:
Sex:
web.archive.org/web/20170902010637/http…
web.archive.org/web/20190608135422/http…
academic.oup.com/molehr/article/20/12/1…
twitter.com/pwkilleen/status/1039879009… (Oxford Dictionary of Biology)
Gender:
SEP: "2.2 Gender as feminine and masculine personality ... Instead, she holds that gender is a matter of having feminine and masculine personalities that develop in early infancy as responses to prevalent parenting practices."
plato.stanford.edu/archives/win2017/ent…
Scalia: “The word 'gender' has acquired the new and useful connotation of cultural or attitudinal characteristics (as opposed to physical characteristics) distinctive to the sexes. That is to say, gender is to sex as feminine is to female and masculine is to male.”
tile.loc.gov/storage-services/service/l…
If can't agree on what words mean then the prognosis for a successful conclusion to that "debate" is rather gloomy at best.
