I’m baking granola again, like some fucking American housewife who gets up at 5am to run 10K every morning, with her Vizsla, comes home to do some yoga in the garden as the sun rises, sings to the chickens as she takes eggs from under their warm feathers, milks the goat (nobody in this family has cow’s milk), then wakes the children with the smell of pancakes cooking.

Except this granola is for my 27 year old son and he’ll have it with Greek yoghurt, like a fucking normal.