MY Unspoken Rule for Substackers with Less Than 500 Subscribers
(This Shouldn’t Need to Be Said, But Here We Are)
Look, if you’ve got fewer than 500 subscribers, you’re in the trenches with the rest of us. You’re grinding, refreshing your stats like a junkie, questioning your life choices every time you see “0 new subscribers” for the third day in a row.
So let’s make this clear: If I subscribe to your Substack, you subscribe to mine. No excuses. No ghosting. No “I only subscribe to newsletters that align with my deeply curated aesthetic.” Buddy, your aesthetic is desperation, same as mine.
We’re not The New York Times. You’re not Malcolm Gladwell or Tim Denning….We’re Substack hustlers, clawing our way to relevancy one reluctant email sign-up at a time. The least we can do is have each other’s backs.
But some of you……some of you……are just taking the FOLLOW and running. Like a bad date who orders the surf n’ turf, drinks three martinis, and ghosts before the check arrives. Like my gym motivation after January 15th….see ya..
What is this!!? As Greta Thunberg would say… “How DARE you!”
This is Substack, not a charity. I’m not just handing out subscriptions like I’m Oprah. You get a sub, you get a sub….no.
That’s not how this works.
So let’s be adults. You follow me, I follow you. We all pretend we’re reading every word of each other’s blog, and we keep this weird, beautiful ecosystem alive.
Or else… I unsubscribe from yours…. (IF I can figure out how.)
Probably in like… seven years. When I finally learn how to use this platform. But by then, I’ll be substack famous, and my unsubscribe will be devastating.
Don’t risk it. Click the button