When I tell my daughter, “Five minutes and we’re leaving,” what she actually hears is:

“Continue everything you’re doing. Slowly. Add new games. Start a side quest. I’ll just orbit the square like a patient satellite.”

Or when I say, “I’ll be waiting where I dropped you off,” apparently that translates to:

“Take your time. I’ll do twelve peaceful laps around the plaza contemplating my life choices.”

Five minutes in kid time is a philosophical concept. In parent time, it’s a cardio workout. 🏃‍♂️