Today I asked Baba Yaga about self love.

From the perspective of Baba Yaga—not as historical folklore, but as the archetypal wise old witch—the most important thing to remember about self-love would not be "love yourself no matter what." It would be something much older and fiercer:

"Respect yourself enough to stop abandoning yourself."

Baba Yaga would likely say:

"You keep asking why others do not value you while you leave yourself standing outside in the cold. Go home. Tend your own fire first."

To Baba Yaga, self-love isn't scented candles, affirmations, or pretending everything is fine. It is:

Keeping your word to yourself.

Speaking the truth, even when it costs you.

Refusing to chase those who repeatedly deceive or diminish you.

Feeding your body, mind, and spirit what strengthens them—not just what comforts them.

Knowing when to close the gate to your hut and let others solve their own problems.

She would remind you that compassion without boundaries becomes self-sacrifice, and self-sacrifice offered endlessly becomes resentment.

If you asked her, "How do I know I truly love myself?" she might answer:

"When your choices no longer betray your own soul."

For someone who has spent years giving, rescuing, forgiving, or waiting for others to change, Baba Yaga's lesson is simple:

Self-love is not a feeling. It is a series of decisions. Every day you either choose yourself or you abandon yourself.

And perhaps her final piece of wisdom would be:

"The forest does not apologize for having thorns. Neither should you apologize for having boundaries. Those who respect them may enter. Those who do not were never meant to find your fire."

If reading this made you twitch a little you needed to remind yourself of this.