If I may advocate for “I can’t imagine” for a second :)

I was surprised when you said it was one of your most hated comments, as I saw it as a natural, sincere feeling.

I have thought it and said it many times, as in “I can’t imagine what it’s like to live in Gaza”…

Reading your essay, I realize it might just be a matter of semantics.

Your friend Liebe puts it best:

“She said, ‘I have no idea what you are going through. I have not lost my partner.’ I felt somehow seen, and I talked about the pain.”

So maybe we can imagine just fine, but what we mean, is we have no idea what it actually feels like.