The masculine ideal being sold online, as talkd about by Eva Oh also infects gay men. Our gay ideal shows up as perfect performance rather than untidy vulnerability.

My own Dom/sub experiences have revealed the same thing. Men arrive full of swagger, drawn to the permission I give them to cry in my arms.

Eva’s piece is well worth the read. It's not a hit piece. It’s just an observation into what men need for a balanced emotional life.