7 years in: things I'd tell 19-year-old me

(she wouldn't listen but maybe you will)

1. The person who makes you feel calm is very rare. Your nervous system will thank you.

2. You'll have the same fight multiple times. The growth is in fighting better each time, not never fighting again.

3. "Working through it" isn't cope. Sometimes staying means you're both willing to be bad at something until you're less bad at it.

4. Building companies together is unsexy and logistical and the most intimate thing you'll do. Competence is hotter than any date night.

5. The relationship will be boring sometimes. That's not a problem, that's what you're building towards.

6. Choose them when they're unimpressive. When there's no audience and no reward. That's the actual test.

7. What you need at 19 vs 26 will be completely different. You'll both evolve. That's the entire point.

Happy Valentine's Day. Go be in love or don't both are fine.