Haha! Law school was good for something, even if I never went on to practice.

That story about the fuckers trashing all the good books at the New College of Florida? Yeah, the fuckfaces justified that on the basis of "Florida Statute 237," which, they said, did not permit the transfer of state property into private hands.

That's obviously bullshit. The state sells cars from its fleet all the time (a quick google search confirms that, though even if it didn't immediately confirm that, reasonable people would assume that Florida is just like every other state and doesn't trash its used cars). But maybe there's a statute specifically for the university system? Or for schools?

Maybe, but "Florida Statute 237" ain't it. There are a number of things that could mean, and with a knowledgeable person doing the search (me) none of them had anything to do with disposal of university property.

So searching more using the experience I had doing research in BC, I found -- drumroll please -- "Florida Statutes Chapter 273 -- STATE-OWNED TANGIBLE PERSONAL PROPERTY".

Lo, and behold! A statute directly on point, and with the right digits in a different order! What does this say about disposal of obsolete or unwanted state property?

273.05 Surplus property.--

(1) The custodian may classify as surplus any property in his or her custody that is obsolete or the continued use of which is uneconomical or inefficient or which serves no useful function as to any activity or location under his or her supervision.

Oh, interesting! But what happens after this custodian (a university might have several, each responsible for different divisions of the university -- the head librarian would almost certainly also be the "custodian" of the library's books for purposes of this law since you would want the head librarian to determine when a book was or wasn't continuing to serve an educational purpose) rules a book or other material “surplus”?

273.055 Disposition of state-owned tangible personal property.--

(1) Certified surplus property shall not be sold, transferred,

Aw, crap. Looks like that fuckface throwing away books was correct. They had no choice but to throw things away since they can't be sold or transferred.

What? You wanna know what comes after the comma in this paragraph of the statute? Okay, sure, I suppose I can allow that:

(1) Certified surplus property shall not be sold, transferred, cannibalized, scrapped, warehoused, or destroyed

Wait, they can't scrap, warehouse, or destroy it either? What do you do with this stuff then? Was there even more to this particular paragraph of the Florida Statutes?

273.055 Disposition of state-owned tangible personal property.--

(1) Certified surplus property shall not be sold, transferred, cannibalized, scrapped, warehoused, or destroyed without prior written authority from the custodian.

Ohhhhhh, they can do whatever they want with it, but they just have to keep records so that they can prove later that they weren't giving away valuable stuff with their best friends, then profiting off the valuable stuff that they gave away. That makes sense. It's not a limit on what the university can do, it's just an anti-corruption record-keeping provision.

So when the New College of Florida trashed all the liberal books in their library and the entire collection of written works kept by the gender resource center, they ALSO lied to the Sarasota Herald-Tribune reporter who was writing up a story on that?

Gotcha.

Still, I'm sure that they got written permission from the Florida Ministry of Truth to tell the Herald Tribune that Florida Statute 237 prevented the college from giving the books away or selling them. Everything's fine. Nothing to see here.