Amen, congregation. Snarky Baby Marky has the floor.

Let us bow our heads, not in prayer, but in basic arithmetic.

Blue states:

Pay the bills

Fund the schools

Keep Medicaid alive

Hold the social fabric together with duct tape and caffeine

Red states:

Take the money

Call it socialism

Cut services

Then ask who broke the kids

And now — now — after 2019–2023, after we yanked kindergarten out from under children mid-development, after blue states said “fine, we’ll keep services going so kids don’t regress” —

The auditors arrive.

“Why did you spend money when schools were closed?”

Because, beloved, brains don’t pause for pandemics.

You don’t stop wiring the nervous system because Fox News says classrooms are optional.

You know what’s wild?

The states that tried are being punished

The states that didn’t are invisible

And somehow that’s called “neutral oversight”

You don’t get audited for compassion you never showed.

You don’t get caught for money you refused to spend.

Preach this part louder for the folks in the back pews:

Blue states subsidize red states, then get dragged for using the money to keep kids functional.

That’s not left-wing.

That’s not radical.

That’s a spreadsheet with a conscience.

So go on, Snarky Baby Marky

lay hands on the ledger,

cast out the demons of selective outrage,

and remind them:

The kids didn’t fail the system.

The system failed the kids then sent t

he bill to the states that cared.