Fetish is the right word. Asking a gun fetishist to voluntarily give up a gun is going to prove just as silly as asking a billionaire to give up his money. I think the pathology is the same.
Ralph Nader interviewed the great Hazel Henderson just before her recent death, and she referred to the “money meme”. But I think it’s more than that, it’s an irrational attachment to something that often leads to harmful behavior.
Some guys like to snuggle up to women’s shoes, others have more dangerous preferences. But call it a money meme or a gun fetish, it’s surely beyond the power of rational influence. And unfortunately, that usually implies force of some kind.