BBC PRESENTER VOICE: A YouGov poll finds that 30% of British adults consider Vladimir Putin the greater threat to the United Kingdom, against 26% for Donald Trump.

The President is said to be furious.

Sources close to the White House confirm he has been demanding to know how he is losing to a man who has, by comparison, barely tried.

Trump has taken to Truth Social to present own tally: seven sovereign nations bombed; 120 schoolchildren killed at their desks in Minab, Iran (a figure he noted Putin has never come close to achieving); and, as his closing argument, the extraction of a sitting head of state and his wife from a heavily fortified presidential palace. Trump felt he deserved more recognition in the threat-perception category and has demanded a recount

Trump’s mood improved considerably upon learning that he and Putin together are leading the pairs event at 39%, a result Trump is understood to be treating as a joint medal. Their nearest competitors are Kim Jong-un and his daughter Kim Ju Ae, approximately 13, who have been making a strong showing on the world stage — she having recently been photographed driving a tank and firing a sniper rifle, which the judges acknowledge is technically impressive, though they note she bears an unsettling resemblance to the murderous animatronic doll from Squid Game and that this is affecting their ability to score objectively.

The 4% who selected Neither have been described internally as “people we can work with.”

The 1% who said Don’t Know have been offered jobs in the US State Department.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​