O Glorious Saint Keith,

Defender of the Forwarded Meme,

Apostle of the Unverified Screenshot,

Bearer of the Blessed Rainbow Goatee,

We come to thee in humble confusion,

Lost in a sea of half-truths and blurry JPEGs.

Guide us with thy sacred caps lock

And shield us from the tyranny of Snopes.

May your newsfeed ever overflow with righteous indignation,

And may your notifications remain ever unread.

Teach us to discern fake news not with fact,

But with conviction strong and spelling optional.

Saint Keith, Light of the Basement Echo Chamber,

Grant us courage to argue online without evidence,

Strength to post through the bans,

And wisdom to never read the article before sharing it.

In your name we say,

Amen, Awomen, and Awoke.