Rieslings that have been marketed as Brauneberger Juffer for ages (Oliver Haag: "An incredibly world-famous name") must be declared as Maring-Noviander Juffer from the 2026 vintage onwards. This is to avoid „misleading consumers“, as they say. And not all of them, but only those that have their roots in the Maring-Noviand district. As if terroir had anything to do with municipal boundaries. Or even a brand.

Because a few hectares of the Piesporter Goldtröpfchen are located in the Dhron district, wines from there will also have to try to conquer the world as Dhroner Goldtröpfchen in future. And Piesporter Grafenberg will become Dhroner Grafenberg.

This is what the world has been waiting for!

But that's not all. Anyone who owns plots in Zeltingen-Rachtig will no longer be allowed to sell wines from there as Zeltinger, but as Rachtiger. And of course, the Kröver Nacktarsch Grosslage must then be called Kröver Region Nacktarsch. That is what the law stipulates. And it stipulates many, many more name changes, as the Trierer Volksfreund kindly points out.

In Burgundy, the names of the most famous Grand Crus have been added to the village names, whereas in Germany they will be removed.

Who exactly noticed all this so suddenly? After 55 years of the 1971 Wine Act, the youngest of those who took no offense at the municipal boundaries of individual vineyard sites (Einzellagen)?

Or better yet: How many generations of civil servants failed to notice or even complain about what they suddenly call "consumer deception" during this period?

The winegrowers are now actually being made the scapegoats. At least they are now trying to persuade mayors and local councillors to swap land and, if necessary, move boundaries in order to save what is to be destroyed without any need: fame, pride, tradition.

German authorities are doing what they do best: shooting themselves and their taxpayers in the foot — in this case, winegrowers, without whose heroic work on the steep slopes of the Moselle the entire valley would be a godforsaken depression area of the highest order.

Without a tape measure, the world remains inaccessible and incomprehensible to German officials, who still seem to be deeply rooted in the Wilhelmine era. These paper tigers and bean counters completely lack any sense of the big picture, or indeed any sense at all. This country and its index card authorities is and will forever remain the land of the narrow-minded Krähwinkler. They may soon allow Moselle Franconian as a foreign language — instead of Latin. At a festive ceremony at the Roman wine press, where free beer from the Eifel will be served and, for the ladies, Frascati — at least.