There has been a strong familial pattern of blame within my Christian family lineage. Eve ate the apple. She was the problem... and this got translated within our story, that women are the problem. This in turn translated to....somehow if you/they were different, changed, hadn't done..., were better.... and the list goes on; then life would be ok. It took a while for me to shift this perspective within my own reaction to others and, particularly, in my intimate partnership however, what supported this journey towards befriending blame (and its dissolving) was mindfulness, somatic and nonviolent communication practices and John O'Donohue's Blessing for Presence which became and still is my daily prayer. Particularly, the first two lines, call me home: 'May you awaken to the mystery of being here and enter the quiet immensity of your own presence. May you have joy and peace in the temple of your senses.' This brings me home time and time again, so that I can hear the blame, feel my pain yet stay connected to self and other. Othering disappears. Blaming. In the company of presence, I can see what is calling. A need to be held, for understanding, compassion, care and connection. I have so wanted to reply to your many beautiful posts before this. Each one is worthy of reflection. Thank you for your offering and reflections. Thank you to all those who comment as I find them truly interesting as well.