Self-reflecting the feelings when I earn money:

• What did I feel? I feel happy and excited. But at times, I also feel anxious about whether I can deliver work that is good enough to meet or even exceed my clients’ expectations. I worry a lot about what might happen if I fail to meet those expectations — will people be disappointed? Leave negative reviews? Tell others that I’m not good enough? Will I end up losing future clients?

• Why did I have these feelings? It comes from a lack of confidence and dissatisfaction with myself. I tend to focus on and magnify my shortcomings. I don’t allow myself to do things imperfectly, and I hope to gain recognition and approval from every client.

• What are the mindsets that I can improve? Over time, as I’ve worked with more clients and gone through repeated cycles of “self-torment,” my mindset has gradually improved. I’ve started focusing more on the value I can bring to them instead of constantly focusing on myself. If my value isn’t enough yet, I can make up for it through action and effort. I should treat myself with kindness instead of getting trapped in internal struggles. Internal struggles doesn’t really benefit me or anyone else.