Why I Don’t Use Lifestyle FOMO To Grow My Business
People who know me shake their head pleading "what a waste". But IDGAF
Before the haters hit, I’m not completely against influencer culture. I was part of the early wave of foodie Instagram circa late-20teens. We ate and drank our way around NYC. At first for fun, then the invites… and then paid. There were a few dozen of us, we all knew each other because we were all at all the places.
For me; a fun way to meet people in a new city.
Others saw it as a way to get in front of the camera too, build a following around themselves, become a little famous, you know… become influencers. Some are likely still in your Instagram feed today.
However.
>> Fast-forward back to the present topic at hand >>
Shilling a steakhouse for kicks is not the same as selling high-ticket — a purchase with vastly different consequences.
Coaching, consulting, educational courses etc — what we do can change the trajectory of someone’s life. The stories of positive transformation push us forward and keep us in the coaching game. It’s exhilarating watching and helping people change. But it’s not always like that.
We’ve all been burned
I’ve spent over $50k on gurus even AFTER realizing they didn’t have my best interests in mind. Stupid right? That’s how powerful and cult-like it can be when exploiting lifestyle.
Fuck that.
We create what we secretly want. Like it or not, we’re attracting the audience we subconsciously desire
Like attracts like.
Not a week goes past where a colleague will mirror a story about a disaster client whose journey is a carbon copy of their own.
And until we realise this, and actively stop the pattern, it will continue. It’s what people refer to as “going around the mountain”. We’ll keep having the same experience until we clock it, pause, have an “aha” moment and level up.
Yes, the work is hard. But honestly what else are you gonna do? Sit on the couch eating Doritos all day watching re-runs of Murder She Wrote?
Is selling FOMO the #1 tool of the charlatan?
Look, fear of missing out can be useful.
Eg: “If you don’t get out of bed and be ready for me to pick you up at 5, you will miss out on the show tonight and making memories with your friends”
But in the hands of capitalism, FOMO can be insidious.
People doom scroll and feel shit about themselves. Do we really want people feeling bad because of our marketing? Because we’re trying to sell our thing? Do we really wanna go full Zucks?
The role luck plays
I’m white. Aussie. Cis male. I like to think I’m reasonably intelligent (friends will say I’m stretching it). Hasn’t been all roses. But I’m fortunate, and grew up in a country that largely supports its citizens. Talk about luck.
Today, I travel full-time. From Machu Picchu to Tokyo. And because of my partner’s job, sometimes we’re invited to stay in the world’s most luxurious hotels. Again, icing on the lucky cake.
Now. I could post pics of the outrageous stuff we experience. I could lean right into the “you can have my lifestyle too if you buy my thing”.
Problem is, it’s bullshit.
Problem is, it attracts people chasing that lifestyle.
Problem is, it attracts people who put money 1st.
Anyway, it’s inconsistent with who I am. People who wear their wealth on the outside are weird. My favourite friends are the ones who you can’t tell their bank balance.
So, what kinda business do you want?
None of what I’ve said matters if you don’t care — if you just want the money. However, let’s assume you have a heart and are not a monster.
Choosing what to reveal in your marketing isn’t easy.
Veer too far from your core ethics and you risk feeling like an imposter. You might end up with a few extra clients but those very people may give you a business you hate.
But then on the flip side, if you don’t have anything major to get attention with, is there anything wrong with showing a little “lifestyle cleavage”, so to speak?
I don’t think it’s clear-cut. But I know for sure that intention matters.
Tell me if you’re using influencer-style marketing for your business, and let me know why in the comments. No judgement, oh god no. We’re all different. And maybe I’ve got it all wrong.
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See you next Saturday.
Cheers,
Pat Sgro
PS: Still want more? Gander over here to see what working with me looks like.
Some interesting perspectives and good lessons in here, Pat. Sorry to hear you got burned! Awesome to see you turn that around and put some good out into the world.
I liked the phrase "icing on the lucky cake" - that's neat!
It’s an interesting debate…I think you still need to show people how much better their lives would look and feel, if they hire you compared to their current way of life, it will resonate with those who envision a more sophisticated or happier version of themselves and their lives…there is nothing wrong with that way of selling what you have to offer as long as it’s authentic and generously crafted towards genuinely wanting to help people…